So this is life. Preparing for a new baby, caring for an infant, learning how to be a better wife, planning and assessing student learning, organizing school administrative work, building curriculum, being Christ to youth despite their circumstances, leading a marriage Bible study, listening and sharing with close friends, missing my family back home, and all the while planning/preparing three meals a day for my family and my son and sleeping a full 8 hours a night. The Lord has been preparing me for a humble lifestyle. I never knew what it would look like. But with His strength, I do it all.
Sure, it’s not what I had pictured 5 years ago. As I was getting my college degree and credential to teach, I always thought I would end up somewhere in the plains of Africa. But somehow, I am here; for such a time as this. For such a PLACE as this. I love it here, and I love my family here. Who knows where we will be tomorrow? Why not just worry about today?
I am slowly learning what it means to be a mother of “small children.” It means I can’t do everything I think I should because I must do what I need to do. Teaching at this school for two years now has opened my eyes to the needs of not only the students in the community, but the training up of teachers to well equip those students to be successful in their futures. My mind fills with ideas and practical ways to aid and build up the school. Yet this planning and preparation comes at a price: Sometimes my family is the one who suffers. I may not make dinner because I am planning for a day’s lesson. I may not play with my son because I have to grade papers all night. I may miss a chance to spend time with my husband because my mind is preoccupied with ways to encourage the teachers on a daily basis. Now with a new baby on the way (my darling Evelyn), my school schedule decreases and my family schedule increases. It frightened me at first: Can’t I do both equally? Well, I could. But I won’t. I feel that the Lord has prepared and growing me into a successful teacher, and that won’t fade away if I take time to be with my family. I don’t want to miss these years. Yet this has been one of the most difficult decisions in my adult life; teaching or full-time mothering? The Lord has given me a wonderful gift: He has given me a deep passion for both. I will wait on His opportunities as they present themselves, and in the meantime, I LOVE being a mommy.
